by Christine Wilson, Hive member, and facilitator
Taken by Troy Bronsink, Hive founder, on moving day and including Christine and 3 of her young adult kids
Audre Lorde, a famous black, lesbian, feminist, poet and thinker, said, famously: “The master’s tools will never dismantle the master’s house.” She was predominantly speaking here of language. Language is inherently patriarchal, meaning hierarchical. Language was created to clarify power structures and commerce. It is not neutral. I encountered this stronger than ever in a desire to write about the meaning of community, specifically at the HIve.
This difficulty extends into our culture as we uncover what it means to be American or human in this time of a pandemic. I can see why. As I looked for a word to talk about what we do at the Hive, I realized there is no word for it. Audre Lorde was right, the language is hierarchical. Is the Hive a community or a cooperative? And what does it mean to be good citizens of a country or organization?
Community is defined as a group of people who have something in common whether location, religion, or gaming.
A cooperative, as a noun, is defined as working jointly in a business enterprise.
I’ve always liked the word citizenship, but the definition for citizen is mainly about being entitled to be protected. It’s written as an entitlement, not working together to create something.
I can see how we as a community at the Hive are struggling to define what we are doing here. And how we all come with different beliefs about what any of these words mean based on our own life experiences.
That’s the question, isn’t it? What the freak is the Hive? Trying to describe what we do at the Hive and struggling to find the right single word is connected to this bigger question happening: What does it mean to be a citizen of this country or planet, and what do good citizens do?
The right word for the Hive and the country doesn’t exist. The Hive is not a product or service. There are no sales people trying to sell and give good customer service. You are not simply a consumer if you are a member of the Hive. No one is making a profit, but also as a non-profit we do much more than soliciting donors or servicing non-invested clients.
We are a movement to re-create a more mindful world in a slow and sustainable way. We are “working jointly toward” as in the cooperative definition. We have a “shared interest” as in the community definition, but that interest is a moving, breathing interest, an expression in the world of mindfulness/wholeness. We are citizens meaning we all have a role to play, but let’s drop that entitlement word. Otherwise, it’s like me saying I’m entitled to sex because I’m married. I mean, I am, right? But saying it feels so wrong. Sex is an expression of the love, not an entitlement, and love is a mystery.
We are co-making at the Hive. No one is making money from this movement. No one. Whether you give as a donor or a member, you are supporting something we are making together. As a lead team member (we’re not called staff for a reason) and facilitator, I get a small stipend, but I mainly function like a volunteer because I believe in the movement. The first time I was a part of a class at the Hive, and was trying to figure the place out, I thought about the cost of membership and wondered, how are they keeping the lights on?
The Hive will continue to be created by how we all show up together. You can not pay a membership fee at the Hive and expect transactionally to be handed community. That’s as dirty as the sex metaphor I used before. We are sharing in the financial responsibility it takes to co-create this, and then we all make the community by how we show up together.
My kids (I have five) inevitably came home from school at some point in kindergarten to complain about not having friends. Of course, they had friends, but a slight had happened in their eyes. I would ask what they wanted the other kids to do that would feel friendly. They would say things like: ask them to play, say nice things, share, or ask them questions to get to know them. Then I would ask if they were doing any of those things. It’s the old mom gotcha!
It is true to have friends, you must be a friend. To have and be part of a community, we must co-create that community. We must be a good citizen of the community. We must show up in the way that we hope others will show up to us. On a deeper level, we must learn how others like to be treated, and show up to them in a way that feels loving or kind to them, as we communicate what feels like love or kindness to us.
This Hive question is no different than the American question. Is it our job during Covid to keep the economy alive or to take care of each other’s health by flattening the curve? Making this an either/or question is a false dichotomy. Being a good citizen is to participate in co-making what we want this country to be. To vote: yes. To buy from local restaurants in your neighborhood: yes. To care about each other’s health: yes. To be a friend: yes.
Words and language and writing will fail to fully communicate this concept. Don’t believe me? Co-making, used to communicate here, is not even in the dictionary. All good mysteries hover above the page or computer screen, between us.
Every class at the Hive has a mystery to it that comes from what is co-made together in the circle. You can’t just get the cliff notes on a class at the Hive, you must experience, participate, and stir your own goodness into the mix. And it is possible that during the time of Covid, we are learning about our co-created country as well. May we, indeed, show up in the way we wish this world to be created.